POINT PLEASANT, WV — The Holler Herald’s Field Services Division has issued its second identification card after residents repeatedly interrupted apparent Mothman encounters to ask whether the creature would pose beside a lifted truck.
The advisory describes a large winged figure with glowing red eyes and the expression of somebody who has read the inspection report.
“People see him standing there and immediately start hollering for their wives to bring a phone,” a division spokesperson said. “He may have information. Give him a minute.”
Resident Brenda Toler reported finding the creature beneath her porch light shortly after eleven Tuesday night.
“He kept looking at me, then looking toward the garage,” Toler said. “I figured he wanted me to open it.”
Her husband disputed that interpretation.
“There’s tools in there,” he explained. “We don’t know him.”
The encounter ended when Toler switched on a brighter floodlight. Mothman departed, leaving the couple unsure whether they had missed an important warning or simply made the yard unpleasant.
Field investigators recommend identifying the creature by its enormous wings, red eyes, and ability to make an otherwise ordinary evening feel like the beginning of a documentary.
Residents should avoid pursuing it for photographs, offering unsolicited directions to the statue, or asking whether it knows Bigfoot.
“They don’t all work together,” the spokesperson said.
Those encountering Mothman should remain calm, turn off unnecessary exterior lighting, and allow a reasonable opportunity for communication.
If the creature continues staring silently, residents may return indoors and worry there.
The division also cautioned against installing a brighter bulb to improve visibility.
“You’ve got something eight feet tall watching your house,” the spokesperson added. “You have identified enough.”
Have you encountered Mothman? Submit your field report to The Holler Herald. Include the location, approximate wingspan, and whether he seemed disappointed in you personally.
The Holler Herald — West Virginia’s Least Reliable News Source.
